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I’ll try to make this post quick as I have a lot of boring but necessary errands to attend to a city or two away.

Husband and I just got a yard which is the first yard we’ve had in several years. I’ll also note that this is the first yard that is ours, because the last yard was a shared one with the 4-plex and our landlords used to leave random trash in it, and there were even rats. I’m still trying to forget about them, because the situation made me angry. *Hums and pretends to meditate.*

This is the one that REALLY counts.

What it’s made me realize is that I want a yard, and even though my mother is a master gardener with a certificate to prove it, I don’t know the first thing about gardening or yards. I know you’re supposed to use water on them, but apparently it’s a balancing act. Right now, we moved in our plants, but because it was winter, and they’re outside plants, they’ve all basically died in their pots.

The yard has no grass as of right now, and my husband and I are trying to figure out what to do with it.

psych

Is this what you do with a yard? I don’t have a tree! I’m so confused. (via hulu.tumblr.com)

Me: I almost picked up soil on the way home today!
Parker: Yeah, but you have to get a specific kind, and you have to mix it with the dirt already there. And if we’re going to put in grass, you have to do it just so.
Me: …Oh. Well, I’m glad I didn’t buy anything then!
Parker: We also have to figure out how much grass we’re going to put in and what to do with the rest of the yard.
Me: Right.

A call made to my mom 
Me: Can I compost with dog poop?
Mom: NO.
Me: Oh man, that’s the main thing I was going to compost.
Mom: You can’t use it. You can use coffee grounds, but you also have to use a little bit of dirt. You can dig some up in your backyard. Actually, it’d probably be better to get some from the store. You can also put in old lettuce. Start in some kind of small bucket.
Me: Okaaay.

The dog doesn’t really know what to do with it either, but her purpose in the backyard is more straight forward. She’s really small, and the ground is uneven so lots of puddles accumulate, and then she doesn’t want to go outside. Instead, she runs to the front door, like, “Walk??” and I’m like, “You do know it’s also wet and raining out front, right? You don’t always get walks. Sometimes you just need to pee in the yard. That’s part of why we have it.” And then I usually take her for a walk anyway, because I’m a sucker, and I want our carpet to smell like NOTHING.

Right now, the main thing that’s out there are these flamingos in Christmas hats we got from Fred Meyer. They’re pretty cool and are on one of my previous posts. The cat likes the backyard better than the dog, probably because she’s more used to having one, and she really likes to go out and check out the flamingos. I’m not sure if she thinks she’s their leader, but that’s my best guess so far. The dog likes them too, but not as much as the cat.

Dog: Are you guys okay? Nope, still not edible. Still probably not alive. All right, bye.

Cat: Ah yes…exactly where I left you. Stay there and worship me. Good…goooood. I will use you in my plot to takeover. Be ready at my word.

Last night, I took down almost all of our Christmas decorations (finally) and moved some of the boxes out of our living room. The dog was asleep for this, but when she woke up, she looked around with an expression that said, “Woah, this place looks better! How long was I asleep?” It was fast, and I was too busy laughing to document it, but trust me, it was great.

Anyway, I’ll edit this later and post a pic so you guys can help me. I clearly need help.

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