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Romantic relationships have interesting dynamics, especially new ones. One of my friends is currently dating someone. It’s all new and exciting. It makes me wonder about you, my readers, and in general:

When is a relationship at its best?

I recently went back and read the beginning of Parker and my’s relationship a few days ago in my journal. The most memorable thing before we were dating:

Parker said, “I want bacon,” and then everyone wanted bacon.

However, after we started dating, I kept saying, “I love it when Parker does [this],” or “Parker said [that] today, and it was AWESOME!” To be fair, before you date someone, if you’re just friends with them first, you think the above but don’t say it.

When you start dating that person, out of nowhere, this giant flower of feelings that has bloomed bursts and sends little pollen everywhere in everyone’s eyes.

The beginning of the relationship.

The beginning of the relationship. [Bridesmaids]

To you, and to some of your loved ones in the beginning, this creates a romantic equivalent of the first snow falling. For other bystanders, it creates extreme irritation.

Everyone else. [thesubocsubs.tumblr.com]

Everyone else. [thesubocsubs.tumblr.com]

My husband once asked me when one of our friends started dating if I missed the beginning of relationships. Although, I contest there are amazing, wonderful things that only occur at the start, like Chandler Bing, I am not a big fan. I’m too hyper-actively analytic to enjoy the start in full, even though there is a rush that comes with it. A lot of worrying goes down.

Or maybe this analogy happened too often.

Or maybe this analogy happened too often.

The start of a relationship is full of possibilities. Part of why it’s so exciting to be a new parent, perhaps. Who will this person be? And a relationship is like creating a new person. And sometimes that person is a sociopath.

That’s the other reason I don’t like the beginning of a relationship. I have all these questions and no answers. I can’t know ahead of time more or less what will generate a response. Deep down, I am weirdly scientific about relationships, and I want to know enough to make myself comfortable.


Clearly, my favorite part is when the relationship is still fresh, but people are comfortable. No one is freaking out, and everyone knows that it’s gonna be okay. This is so rare. I also want insurance that I’m not going to piss someone off by doing something zany.


Those days are behind me now though, and soon I’m sure I’ll be weirded out by the fact that my peers are married and having kids. The kids will referred to us as adults, and there will be a Sherlock Holmes’ file worth of responsibilities. I still find this stupidly creepy (mainly the fact that people would call us adults).

I’d like to add that when it comes to pop culture, the beginning of a relationship is super exciting and creates the BEST fanmade videos. Just saying!

To be fair, I still can’t predict very well whether Parker will find an internet clip or picture funny. I showed him pictures of Kermit the Frog where he’s making that weird mouth, and I thought it was the funniest thing ever. It’s probably the number one reason I ever watched The Muppets.

But Parker just said in this scientific manner, “That’s just because the hand is making that shape.”

Me: I KNOW that, but it’s funny, because he looks all sour-faced. It’s hilarious!

Parker (chuckling): The real enjoyment for me is watching you get all worked up about how funny Kermit the Frog looks.

There you have it. Find someone who loves you and that you love so much that they’ll just be happy that you get so entertained by a muppet’s facial contortions.


Again, I can’t explain why this is funny or why I laughed so stupidly hard or why I posted it just now.

Update: this is my 69th post. Parker wanted to know if I made it special. I explained it was sort of appropos, since it was about relationships.