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I recently took a geeky quiz, and I got asked this question:

You have traveled back in time, and now have an opportunity to destroy your most hated enemy while they are still an innocent child. Do you take it?

Til pointed out to me that it doesn’t dictate that this person is your CHILDHOOD enemy, just your most hated enemy. I pointed out to Parker that “destroy” doesn’t mean kill, it can mean emotionally obliterate. He disagrees.

Jim from the Office. Or I could just do this...

Jim from the Office. Or I could just do this…

Then today, I read the best article I’ve ever read by Cracked: “The 5 Most Incredible Things Ever Done Purely out of Spite.”

Occasionally, I ponder things about my life. One of them is how I am not more successful, career-wise. People are motivated by different things: money, family appeasement, horrible/wonderful childhoods, etc. They are discouraged by others: lack of money, low determination, low intelligence, a conflict with decisions they made earlier in life…or bad decisions they keep making.

Let’s just say that this happened.

Andy Dwyer, everyone.

Okay, I didn’t break everything. But you get the idea. I almost put my “Shit, Tyrone” picture here, but I could pretty much use that in any post I ever make. It’s TOO relatable.

The other thing I recently realized was how virtuous I am not. When I reviewed all the virtues, I got to the bottom and thought, “Nope, none of those!”

Thanks to Cracked.com, I have realized what happened. I never had anyone who angered me enough to build a “spite fence”–literally or figuratively. Of course, my enemies aren’t unbelievably more successful than I am either. In fact, most of them are inanimate objects or complete strangers. I do want to build a spite fence…but it’s an actual fence, and that’s just because I don’t care much for neighbors. It won’t cause me to build a business from the ground up or buy a house to champion against haters.

There’s part of me who would love to do something like on that list. It does feel like my best shot at motivation. None of the other methods have worked so far, so maybe spite would do it.

On the other hand, I don’t want to be someone who just can’t let that one thing go. A lot of anger went into those stories, and anger makes me really tired and a little ill-feeling.

Yes, it is, Lilly. [27.media.tumblr.com]

Yes, it is, Lilly. [27.media.tumblr.com]

It’s only the beginning of the weekend though, so we’ll see. There will always be opportunity to “build my spite fence” yet.