I know I live in the South when I see an online moving ad for roaches, and I have to scroll down, because it FREAKS me out. Unrelated to what I was going to post about.

I am starting to think that I’m boring. The evidence is piling up against me.

The primary reason
My mom’s phone poops out on her while she’s talking to me. She says it does this when she’s talking to other people too, but I don’t buy it. It never happens when she’s speaking, only when I am. To be fair, she’s listened to me talk for my entire life, but why would she start hanging up on me now?

Next
I will be at work, and I’ll be having a conversation with someone. I guess that’s not an accurate word. I’m talking inconsistently, and they’re usually behind me in a half room where I face away from them. Then I’ll ask them something, they fail to respond, and I realize that I’ve been talking to myself. This can happen anywhere from a sentence to a whole paragraph. I’m not exactly sure at what point they get up and leave, but they don’t say anything. They leave in complete silence.

The last doesn’t really count…
It’s my husband, but it’s mutual, and we do it to each other when we’re in a separate rooms. To be fair, he listens to me more than anyone, so he gets a pass. He listens to all the important things.

The worst is when everyone picks the same day to do it
One day a few weeks ago, this happened ALL day. From the time I went to work until after I got home. I just kept talking to people who weren’t there. A few times, it happened in front of customers, a move that makes me look incredibly unlikable, or evil behind the backs of clients. As if I have some kind of torture device under my desk that I use while screaming at them. I really hope it doesn’t come across that way, because I can barely tell my co-workers when something has been done incorrectly.

Help?
I want a viable explanation, so I don’t keep having the same Groundhog Day experience. I already use a ghost as one excuse, so I need something else. Imaginary friend makes me sound completely unbalanced instead of just my usual type of question-ability. I would love to hear thoughts on this.

Follow-up: My mom did call me back. I knew she loved me, but now I get to blog about it!

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